I Bought Another Couch

Remember how I said I wasn’t an adult yet? Well, I bought another couch. I guess whatever part of the brain is responsible for delayed gratification has yet to develop. The hippocampus? I don’t actually know; I just like that word. I always picture hippos at summer camp…their weird nubbin toes struggling with friendship bracelets and gimp. Inevitably someone does an unprecedented cannonball into the lake. In any event, I bought a couch. It was cheap and ugly too! Army green and already covered in cat hair, but it is a sensible scale for our little love nest, seats three people and two cats, and has cushion for your tushion. Yes, I just invented the word tushion…that just happened. Admittedly, as embarrassing as that is to have in writing, I may be less proud of my use of the phrase “love nest”. That’s always seemed like an apt euphemism for pubic hair. Something a sweaty guy wearing a robe might say. Gross. 

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